Have you ever thought back to a moment, maybe recently, maybe a long time ago, and grimaced at yourself. Maybe it was the attitude you had. Perhaps your words were harsh or cruel or manipulative. Maybe it was everything about the situation: bad reaction, your face was loud and obnoxious. Perhaps it just highlights the flaws that you feel are glaring and hideous. Maybe it was the disappointment you caused someone.
I had one of those recently. I was driving home from dropping both boys off at preschool. So I had a few moments of quiet just driving. I like to listen to the radio. I also like the quiet too. My mind was wandering and reflected back on a memory of myself from years ago. To be honest I couldn’t even tell you what that memory was of. But I involuntarily grimaced at the girl of back then, ashamed of her.
I started to say things to myself like: I wish I wouldn’t have . . . or why did I do that!? I felt the shame dump on me. Then I did something I hadn’t done before. I asked God about it. I wondered at the girl from the past and what He could do about it. He said one thing that changed my heart toward her.
I died for her too.
It was simples and just a whisper. I have to admit, I’d forgotten my salvation was for more than today and tomorrow. It’s was for all my yesterdays. It was for her, the girl from the past. The one He’d loved and saved the whole time. The one His grace was already abundant for, especially in her weakness. The sun and weakness He already knew about, paid for and abundantly covered.
I was not excused from making those moments right with anyone I had hurt by my attitude, words or behavior. But I was also free to have a clean conscience because my sun and weaknesses had already been paid for and redeemed.
That’s how big a God we serve!
That’s how big the sacrifice of Jesus on the cross!
That’s how complete the redemption covenant of God is!
Lady Worship Fingers 